Things I’ve Learned So Far

From things I have seen, couldn’t believe and things I have heard.

1. Guatemalans love to honk. They honk at dogs, people, cattle, kids with kites, kids without kites, cyclists, chickens, and basically anything they might run over.

2. Chicken buses like to race each other. Mainly to beat the other guy to a stop and load up on passengers (more mullah).

3. I have yet to actually see a chicken on a chicken bus.

4. If you don’t like picante, you are an outcast.

5. Drivers prefer hand signals over turn signals.

6. A road may exist on a map but, not in reality. That “highway” under construction on the map is really a dirt goat trail going up the mountain. People still use it. Goats, too.

7. Hot water is a luxury and when there’s a widowmaker it’s a great night. A widowmaker is a plastic shower head with electrical heater built in. Yeah, we don’t know what they were thinking either.

8. Hueco does not mean hollow.

9. Guatemalans use lots of speed bumps. They hate them, yet they build more and more in every. Damn. Town.

10. You are either Real Madrid or Barcelona. There is no middle ground. I see their point. In Chapel Hill you are either Carolina or Duke. There is no middle ground–like State, for instance.

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